Archive for June, 2008

Cherry Yacht of the Gods: Floating an Idea for an Improved Naval Megavessel

Friday, June 27th, 2008

So I live with this person who likes to watch Titanic, as well as the Wolfgang Peterson remake of Poseidon, over and over and over again. And over again. And so I too have watched over and over again as Mlle. Titanic the debutante munches thoughtfully on an icecube and decides to emcee a rousing round of King of the Mountain for her 2,223 guests. And I’ve watched over and over again as a rogue wave rolls Lady Poseidon over on her back as if to see what happens. Answer: She gets screwed. (more…)

Odin’s Frican Balls: Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Beowulf

Thursday, June 26th, 2008

The key to Robert Zemeckis’s recent film Beowulf is to understand that it’s an old man’s story. Not so much a story about an old man, as the sort of story an old man would want to tell the youngsters around him. And not a story told by just any old man, but by one with a great sense of humor, a great sense of regret, and a great memory of what it’s like to be young. (more…)

Spear It in the Sky: Pinning Down the Utility of the Term “Spirit”

Tuesday, June 24th, 2008

“While we scoff at them, what we don’t realize is that these shamans, in speaking of ‘spirit,’ are using ‘spirit’ to describe a highly complex and technical reality, much the same way that physicists use the term ‘quark.’ ” –Terence McKenna, reconstructed from memory. (more…)

Quote Eco-Warrior Attacks Big Families Endquote

Saturday, June 21st, 2008

Dave Toschi: And man is the most dangerous animal of all?
Arthur Leigh Allen: That’s the whole point of the story. (more…)

Hornless Unicorn Studios: Movie Ideas of Mine That Won’t Come to Fruition Any Time Soon

Saturday, June 7th, 2008

Hornless Unicorn Studios, in coordination with Human Dwarf Productions and Virgin Rum & Coke Entertainment, presents a Wingless Fairy Film. Several, actually. If you read the following and realize you’d like to turn one of these ideas into a living breathing movie, by all means go for it. (more…)

Deprogramming Your VCR: Famous Scient*l*gists and Their Secret Cries for Help

Friday, June 6th, 2008

If you were bound by blackmail to represent an insane cult for the duration of your natural life, but you had regular access to audiences numbering in the millions, you’d sneak out a few hints about your desperate situation, just like these folks. (more…)